Down on Me (Club 24 #7) Read online

I looked at her. “Good.”

  “Spence.”

  “What?”

  “This is me you’re talking to.”

  I raised an eyebrow at her. “I don’t know what you mean.”

  She stopped walking and looked to her left then her right then back at me as if she were looking for someone or had a secret to tell me and didn’t want anyone to hear. “Remember when we used to go out on Thursday nights because it was college night at the bars and we would drink until two and then go to Denny’s for breakfast followed by sleeping for two hours before being in our first class on Fridays?”

  “Um, yeah?” I asked, surprised and wondering what she was getting at.

  “Remember how we would look like shit Friday mornings in class?”

  I rolled my eyes at her.

  “And that just answered my question. You know what I’m talking about. You look tired and I know you’re not sleeping, so everything isn’t “good.” Abby’s only just started sleeping six hours a night. Babies don’t sleep.”

  I would kill for six hours of sleep of right now.

  She looked around again before and I followed her line of sight. “Are we going to hash this out in the middle of the street, Ryan?”

  “Fine, let’s walk to the park since your hubby had to ruin my plans of talking to you.”

  I grinned. “Sorry. I didn’t know he was staying home today.”

  We walked a few blocks to the community park and found a picnic table. “I’m getting three hours of sleep at a time,” I admitted.

  “That wasn’t what I asked.” She looked around the park.

  “Who do you keep looking for?”

  “No one.”

  “Then why do you keep looking around?”

  “I’m just looking around.” She shrugged and looked away. “I don’t get out of the house much.”

  I knew Ryan was lying. In all the years we’d known each other, I’d never told her that she had a tell. You never did that in poker because you needed to know when you had the upper hand. Like most people, Ryan couldn’t look you in the eye when she was lying.

  I thought back to her original question. It was never easy to admit your failures. Ryan was so good with Abby and while I thought I would know what to do right away, I was wrong. She wanted to know how I was doing, but if I couldn’t even tell Brandon the truth, how was I going to tell Ryan?

  “Things are good besides the sleeping,” I lied.

  “It will get better.”

  Ryan knew something was up. Even though she might act as though she believed me now, she would still hound me later about it. So I decided to give her something to go on. “I do have a question for you.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Did you and Max wait the six weeks before you two … you know?” I shrugged, embarrassed a little.

  “Fucked?”

  “Yeah.” I chuckled.

  “No,” she said bluntly.

  “No?”

  “Hell no.”

  “But—”

  “You and Brandon haven’t had sex yet? It’s been four weeks.”

  “I haven’t wanted to.”

  “Well, you can do other things.”

  I stared at her. Did Brandon put her up to this? “Right, other stuff.”

  “Oh. My. God. I have the best idea ever!”

  My eyes became huge at her declaration. “What?”

  “You and Brandon need a date night.”

  I nodded. “That would be nice.”

  Her smile went from ear to ear. “And I’m going to babysit.”

  Chapter Six

  Brandon

  When I told Ryan before she and Spencer left for their walk to look out for any suspicious cars and people following them because of my fears, she didn’t have time to react since Spencer was walking up to us. Her face spoke volumes, though. How would I ever tell Spencer?

  The girls left for their walk at the perfect time. Tom pulled up for our meeting just as I was closing the garage. We walked through the house and he measured the windows, looked at the doors, and explained how they could keep people out. At the end of it all, he told me he’d get back to me in a day with a price. He would also let me know how long it would take to install everything.

  Tom was going to install everything I’d discussed with Jason including the panic room. My home office was a spare bedroom and, therefore, had a walk-in closet. I knew the closet was tiny, but it wasn’t meant to be a place where we’d stay for a long period of time, so I was confident we could transform it into a panic room.

  We lived within minutes of a police station, and if anything were to ever happen to my family, I was forty-five minutes away at most. Plus, the closet was a little bigger than what we had in the city. Most walk-in closets weren’t actual walk-in closets. Sure you could walk in them, but once you got your clothes in, you couldn’t move. This closet was almost double the normal size because when we were house hunting, we picked a house Spencer loved and women loved closet space.

  After everything was said and done, our house would be the safest on the block.

  But I still had the burden of telling Spencer my plan and I knew she was going to freak. And I couldn’t even get her drunk first since she was breastfeeding Kyle. But then again, what if all of this was all in my head and Michael had put his vendetta to rest?

  *

  I went back to work the following day, but I set an alarm on my phone and made it a point to only work four hours. By the time I made it home, I was only away for six hours.

  The first day I arrived home, Spencer was taking a nap with Kyle on her chest. I’d walked into the bedroom, not quite sure what to expect since two days prior I’d walked in and Spencer was crying her eyes out. But this—this was what I wanted to come home to.

  I didn’t want to necessarily come home to both Spencer and Kyle sleeping. I wanted to come home to them happy. And if they weren’t crying, I assumed they were happy.

  That day, I slipped off my shoes and climbed into bed with them because being with my family was exactly where I wanted to be.

  *

  Date night.

  It had almost been two months since Spencer and I had been out together for a date night. Before Kyle, we used to go out all the time. We’d go to dinner, the movies, baseball games, or even take trips whenever we wanted. I understood that we were now in the next stage of our life and it was what happened as you got older, but I was going to cherish our first date night back on the saddle.

  “Are you sure we should leave Kyle?” Spencer wondered, doing something to her hair.

  “It’s only for a few hours.”

  “What if something happens to him?”

  “Nothing’s going to happen. All of our best friends are coming to have a play date. Who, might I add, are all parents themselves.”

  The original plan was for Ryan to babysit Kyle. I had no doubt she could handle a two month old and a five month old—who were we kidding? There was no way she could! So we called in back-up. Jason and Becca were going to joined Ryan. They were bringing Jason Jr. with them, of course, and while Spencer and I were going to dinner, they were going to keep an eye on Kyle for us. Max, as always, had to work late.

  Jason and Ryan both knew the threat, or at least what I assumed was the threat. Spencer didn’t—yet. I was still dragging my feet telling her that our house was about to become a giant safe house, but Tom and his crew were coming the next day to start construction and Spencer was going to find out one way or another. Plus, with all the noise and the commotion, she’d be better off staying at Ryan’s during the day.

  “We can’t be gone long,” she insisted.

  I stopped, the razor mid-way up my face and looked over at her through the reflection in the mirror. “Babe, Kyle will be okay.”

  She looked back at me. “I’ll need to nurse him.”

  “You left bottles,” I reminded her.

  “He doesn’t go back to sleep easy.”

  I turned
and grabbed her shoulders so she faced me. “Spence, baby, I know you’re scared to leave him for the first time, but we’re leaving him with people we trust and not some random babysitter.”

  She nodded and gave a tight smile. “I know.” She sighed. “Where are we going for dinner?” she inquired, looking up at me with her beautiful honey eyes.

  “Somewhere close.”

  “You promise?”

  I nodded. It was only a fifteen minute drive, and being on the outskirts of San Francisco, that was close.

  “Okay.” She grinned.

  *

  I took Kyle with me downstairs just as there was a knock on the door. No one used the doorbell anymore, fearing they’d wake him.

  “Hey,” I greeted Jason and Becca.

  Becca reached out to take Kyle from my arms. “Oh my God, I can’t get enough of the new baby smell!” She sniffed Kyle’s head.

  “Don’t get any ideas,” Jason warned, a bag slung over his shoulder.

  “Um, guys … Where’s my nephew?” I wondered, looking for Jason Jr.

  “Parking the car.” Jason laughed.

  “What?”

  At that moment, JJ walked in the front door on wobbly legs. I shook my head, laughing as I closed the door behind him.

  “We’re letting him walk more. He walked all the way from the car. With supervision of course,” Becca clarified.

  I knelt down beside him. “You did? Give me a high five, little man!” I grabbed his hand and slapped it with mine as he wasn’t able to since he was only sixteen months.

  “So, did you tell Spencer?” Jason whispered, stepping closer to me and looking around the room. I knew he was referring to the security measures I was taking.

  I stood and shook my head. “I plan to tonight.”

  “Not during dinner,” Becca chimed in.

  “No, I’ll wait until we’re in the car or something.”

  “Maybe wait until you get home,” she suggested.

  “You think?”

  She nodded.

  “I’m not sure what her reaction will be. I didn’t want to do it and have her wake Kyle or something.” I ran my hands down my face. I was stressed, to say the least.

  She whispered, “That’s why you should do it here so she’ll feel safe.”

  Spencer came down the stairs and the conversation was dropped. The more I spoke to my best friends about the situation, the more I felt as though I wasn’t in my right frame of mind about it. I’d always thought I had a good handle on situations. I was smart when it came to business. I was smart when it came to finding Spencer the first time around and setting up her phone to be tracked, but now it was as though my brain was in a fog. It was as though my heart was controlling the situation and not my brain anymore and I needed both to step up to the plate because my family’s life could be in danger.

  Spencer greeted Jason and Becca as she went straight for Kyle. Jason and Becca looked at me and I shrugged. I had no idea why she’d grabbed Kyle from Becca. He wasn’t crying, his diaper didn’t need to be changed and he didn’t need to be fed. I understood she was his mother, but Becca wasn’t a stranger. She didn’t even acknowledge JJ. The more I thought about it, she hadn’t acknowledged Abby when she went for a walk with Ryan the other day either.

  Before Kyle was born, I’d heard Spencer talk about how she and Ryan wanted to raise their children together. And while it wasn’t a dream of mine to raise my children with Jason, it was pretty cool that Kyle was close to JJ’s age. But now my wife seemed to not care.

  A knock on the door took me out of thoughts. Ryan walked in with Abby, and Spencer still didn’t have a reaction toward Ryan’s daughter. I remembered what Spencer told Abby when she was born:

  “Your best friend will be here soon,” Spencer whispered in her ear as she held her.

  “What if it’s a boy?” I whispered to Spencer.

  “They can still be BFFs. He and Jason Jr. will protect Abby and love her like a sister.”

  “And if we have a girl?”

  “Have you seen the way Ryan and I are? No girls will have a chance with him. Our girls will make sure the girls after his heart are right for him. You know, protect him, too.”

  I needed to find out what was bothering Spencer because I knew without a doubt that she wanted our gang to be together forever. She even wanted our children to be best friends and now she wasn’t happy and didn’t acknowledge them. It was as if she had a one track mind and only saw our son.

  We said our goodbyes and I set out to try to recreate our first date.

  *

  “You look beautiful tonight.” I kissed the back of Spencer’s hand as I drove. It really didn’t matter what Spencer was wearing, she was always beautiful.

  She turned her attention away from her cell phone. “Thank you.”

  I glanced at the screen on her phone. She was texting Ryan. We’d only left the house five minutes ago. “Everything okay?” I asked, nudging my head toward her phone.

  “What?”

  “With Kyle.”

  “Oh … yeah.” She put her phone in her purse. “Where are we going?”

  “It’s a surprise.” I smirked.

  She looked around at the darkening sky, the passing mountain side, the bay in the distance, and then she saw it. “Sausalito? We’re going to Scoma’s?”

  I grinned. “That we are.”

  She chuckled. “Mr. Montgomery. What are you up to?”

  “Taking my wife to dinner.”

  “Why do I not believe that’s all your up to?”

  I shrugged my right shoulder. “Guess you’ll have to wait and see.”

  “But we have to be home early.”

  “I know,” I muttered. I understood where Spencer was coming from because I was a wreck when I went back to work, but that was because of Michael getting into my head. Kyle wasn’t in danger and I didn’t plan for Spencer and me to be put in harm’s way this evening. We were going to dinner and then home. Or if we really did recreate our first date then well, we’d have fun in my car afterward.

  *

  When we arrived in Sausalito, we parked on the road just like we had the night of our first date.

  “At least this time it’s not raining.” Spencer laughed, her hand in mine.

  God, I loved her laugh. “Not yet it’s not.”

  “It’s supposed to?” She looked up at the dusk night sky.

  It was. The clouds were rolling in above us, the night air was chilly as it hit across our faces and it wasn’t only because we were next to the ocean. “Just a percentage.”

  “What percent?”

  “Seventy.”

  She stopped walking before we reached the short boardwalk that led to the restaurant. “Why didn’t you tell me? I could have brought an umbrella.”

  This wasn’t my Spencer. This wasn’t the girl who didn’t care if it rained and she got dripping wet. “Let’s make a break for it. A little water won’t hurt,” she’d said that night. Where was that girl? Did motherhood change a woman that much? We weren’t even with Kyle.

  I looked around, checking for anyone who could be working for Michael and following us. I didn’t see anyone except couples walking into the restaurant, people walking dogs, people jogging and cars driving by.

  “Babe, what happened to the girl who didn’t care about running in the rain?”

  She stared at me. “I …” I tilted her chin up so she’d look at me. “Was that your plan?” she questioned.

  “It’s not like I’m God.” I laughed and dropped my hand from her face. “It’s just a coincidence that it might rain tonight.”

  Her gaze dropped from mine and she stared at the ground, taking a few moments before she spoke. “You’re right. It’s just water.” She looked back up at me and grabbed my hand, her eye’s glassy. “Let’s go eat.”

  At that moment, I’d realized that I’d been so focused on protecting people from getting to Spencer and Kyle from the outside that I hadn’t realized that S
pencer was hurting from the inside. I saw the pain in her eyes. The same fear I felt. Was she scared of Michael coming for her and Kyle too?

  I halted her before she could walk away and grabbed her face between my hands. “You know I love you, right?”

  Our eyes locked and she gave a tight smile. “I know.”

  “You can tell me anything.” When the words left my mouth, they broke my heart a little. We used to tell each other everything and now I was scared and hiding shit from her. Obviously, she was hurting as much as me, if not more.

  My heart ached for her to tell me what was bothering her. Instead, all she replied was, “I know.”

  I leaned in, our foreheads touching as I sighed. This wasn’t how I pictured the evening starting. We were supposed to go to dinner, talk, enjoy ourselves and go home. And then … well, then I was going to tell her my secret.

  I hadn’t realized we both had secrets to share.

  I kissed her on the top of her head. “Okay, let’s eat before they give away our reservation.”

  We walked into the blue and white building and they sat us at a table that looked out onto the bay, the same as our first date. Night had fallen, and in the distance, I could see the twinkling lights of San Francisco. It was perfect, even with the dark clouds moving toward us.

  As I looked at the menu, Spencer looked at her phone. I had no doubt she was texting Ryan again for an update. I was about to ask her if everything was okay when the waiter walked up to take our drink order. I ordered a beer and Spencer was okay with water. I knew Spencer wasn’t going to drink because she was breastfeeding and didn’t have enough bottles for Kyle, but I somehow needed to loosen her up so when I dropped my bombshell of a secret she’d be less inclined to lose her mind.

  Spencer picked up her phone right after the waiter left and I grabbed her wrist to get her attention. “Spence, I think the three of them can handle Kyle without you checking in.” I gave a tight smile.

  “I know, but I wanted to make sure Ryan knew where his favorite blanket was.”

  “The one in his bassinet?”

  She looked up from her phone. “Yeah.”

  “Babe,” I pleaded. Before I could say more, the waiter returned with my beer and took our order.